Election jokes collection of hit Rahul Gandhi Manmohan Singh and arvind kejrival

Bihar election political jokes
Election jokes collection of hit Rahul Gandhi Manmohan Singh and arvind kejrival

Rahul Gandhi Jokes in Hindi

 Rahul Gandhi Jokes in Hindi
सोनिया – राहुल बेटा ,
अब आपने पार्टी के बारे में कुछ सोचा?
राहुल – मम्मी अभी अभी तो कांग्रेस हारी है ,
इतनी जल्दी पार्टी करेंगे तो अच्छा नहीं लगेगा

 Rahul Gandhi Jokes in Hindi
राहुल – माँ आपकी वजह से मेरी शादी नहीं हो पा रही है ,
सोनिया – वो कैसे ?
राहुल – आप ही अपने हर पोस्टर में लिखती हो कि –
बहु-मत दो

राहुल गाँधी पप्पू हिंदी चुटकुले


राहुल गाँधी स्कूल से रोते हुए लौटा ,
सोनिया – क्या हुआ बेटा, क्यों रो रहे हो ?
राहुल – मैडम ने बहुत मारा ,
सोनिया – पर क्यों , जरूर तूने ही कोई गड़बड़ की होगी ?
राहुल (रोते हुए)- कसम से मम्मी , मैंने कुछ नहीं किया ,
मै तो चुपचाप सो रहा था

manmohan jokes
1 पिंजरे में 50 बंदरिया और 1 बन्दर को रखा ,
और कहा गया कि जो 1 मिनट में बन्दर को पहचान लेगा उसे 1 लाख रूपए मिलेंगे ,
पहले ओबामा गया- फेल ,
फिर जॉर्ज बुश गया – फेल ,
फिर मनमोहन गया और 10 सेकेण्ड में बन्दर ले आया ,
सबने पूछा कैसे पता चला ,
मनमोहन – मैं पिंजरे में गया और कहा –
.
.
.
.
अगले इलेक्शन में मुझे ही वोट देना,
सिर्फ एक ने कहा- “घंटा ले ले “


Kejriwal Jokes in Hindi
केजरीवाल की पत्नी खाना लगाती है ,,
पत्नी – ये लो , खाना खा लो ,
केजरीवाल – ये क्या है ?
पत्नी – दाल चावल …
केजरीवाल – मैं नहीं खाऊंगा , दोनों मिले हुए हैं ,
और ज्यादा बोली तो धरना दे दूंगा चावल के खिलाफ

 Kejriwal Jokes in Hindi
संता ने नेट बैंकिंग का पासवर्ड रखा –
“ram-sita-laxman-hanuman-ravan-delhi-kejriwal”
बंता – पाजी इतना लम्बा पासवर्ड क्यों ?
संता -क्यूंकि , Bank वाले कहते हैं कि पासवर्ड में 5 character और 1 capital होना जरुरी है ,
बंता – पर पाजी ये केजरीवाल क्यों ??
संता – ओये एक स्पेशल character भी जरुरी है

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Only Pappu Hindi front jokes collection

Pappu only Hindi front jokes collection of latest desi pappu jokes collection
Pappu Hindi Jokes
School Teacher Student Joke in Hindi – Kids Joke
 September 24, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
टीचर बच्चों को बम से बचने का तरीका सीखा रहा था,
टीचर- बच्चों बताओ अगर स्कूल के सामने
बम रखा है , तो क्या करोगे?
पप्पू – 1 – 2 घंटे देखेंगे, फिर,,,,
टीचर- फिर क्या?
पप्पू – फिर कोई ले जाता है तो ठीक,
नहीं तो स्टाफ रूम में रख देंगे
टीचर बेहोश
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Bad Effect of Mobile Joke SMS in Hindi
 September 21, 2015  admin
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 Father Jokes in Hindi, Hindi Chutkule,
Pappu Hindi Jokes
सारे दिन फ़ोन पे चैटिंग करते रहने का नतीजा,
पापा- बेटा क्या कर रहा है?
पप्पू- पापा लगता है वर्षा आने वाली है,
पापा- कुछ पढ़ लिया कर नालायक,
सारे दिन लड़कियों से चैटिंग करता रहता है,
पप्पू- पापा मैं बारिश की बात कर रहा हूँ
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Family Jokes in Hindi
 September 20, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू को उसकी माँ ने खूब पीटा,
पप्पू – पापा आपने मम्मी में ऐसा क्या देख लिया
जो उसको पसंद कर लिया,
पापा- तुम्हारी मम्मी के गाल पे छोटा सा प्यारा सा तिल,
पप्पू- अरे यार,,
आपने इतनी छोटी चीज़ के लिए इतनी बड़ी मुसीबत मोल ले ली
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Father Son and Girlfriend Romantic Joke
 September 18, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
बापू – बेटा कोई गर्लफ्रेंड नहीं है क्या तेरी?
पप्पू- नहीं पापा,
मैं इन सब चक्करों में नहीं पड़ता,
बापू- नहीं बेटा आज कल तो सबकी होती है,
पप्पू- हाँ बापू वैसे एक बनाई हुई है,
बापू ने कान के चांटा मारा-
साले तभी 3 साल से फेल हो रहा है
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बीवी से परेशान Father Son Wife Joke in Hindi
 August 12, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Jokes, Pappu Hindi Jokes, Santa Banta Jokes in Hindi
संता का प्रीतो से झगड़ा हो गया,
संता बीवी से परेशान हो गया
संता पप्पू से-
बेटा कभी शादी मत करना,
ये बड़ी मुसीबत कर देती है,
पप्पू – ठीक है, पापा
मैं कभी शादी नहीं करूँगा,
और अपने बच्चों को भी यही सलाह दूँगा
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Teacher Student Valentine Day Joke in Hindi
 August 6, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
टीचर – कल क्यों नहीं आया?
पप्पू- नहीं बताऊँगा?
टीचर चांटा मारकर- जल्दी बता,
पप्पू – Valentine Day पे गर्लफ्रेंड के साथ था,
टीचर -इतना छोटा होके भी
गर्लफ्रेंड के साथ घूमता है, कौन थी वो लड़की ?
पप्पू – आपकी बेटी,
टीचर बेहोश
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टीचर पप्पू History Joke in Hindi
 August 4, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
टीचर – बताओ 1869 में क्या हुआ था?,
बंटी – जी, महात्मा गाँधी(Mahatma Gandhi) का जन्म,
टीचर – शाबाश बैठ जाओ,
टीचर पप्पू से – 1872 में क्या हुआ?
पप्पू – गाँधी जी 3 साल के हो गए
बैठूँ क्या ,,,,,
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पप्पू की शोले
 August 2, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू को रात के अँधेरे में चोरों ने पकड़ लिया,
जमकर धुनाई की,
कल्लू- ये हाथ मुझको देदे पप्पू ,
पप्पू – हाथ लेले भाई,
पर सुबह सुबह पोट्टी धोने जरूर आ जइयो,
चोर बेहोश
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पप्पू vs पहलवान Very Funny Joke SMS in Hindi
 July 15, 2015  admin
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 Hindi Chutkule, Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू की गाँव के पहलवान से लड़ाई हो गयी,
पहलवान – मैं तेरी चटनी बना दूंगा,
पप्पू – अबे जा ,
मैंने अच्छे अच्छों को पानी पिलाया है,
पहलवान हैरानी से – कैसे ?
पप्पू – मैं होटल में वेटर हूँ
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पप्पू की बीवी, Husband Wife Joke in Hindi
 July 13, 2015  admin
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 Husband and Wife Jokes, Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू की बीवी मर गयी,
लेकिन वो रो नहीं पा रहा था ,
दोस्त – तेरी बीवी मर गयी थोड़ा
तो रो ले ,
पप्पू – आंसू आ ही नहीं रहे ,
क्या करूँ ?
दोस्त – ये सोच की बीवी वापस आ गयी है
Pappu Hindi Jokes
Teacher Student Joke in Hindi
 July 5, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes, student jokes in Hindi, Teacher Hindi Jokes
टीचर क्लास में पढ़ा रही थी ,
टीचर – मैं तुमसे एक सवाल पूछती हूँ ,
सोच समझ कर जवाब देना ,
बच्चे – ठीक है ,
टीचर – बताओ ऐसा कौन सा पान है,
जिसे खाया नहीं जा सकता ,
पप्पू – पेट पकड़ कर जोर से हंसने लगा ,
टीचर – इतनी हंसी क्यों आ रही है ?
पप्पू – आपने सवाल ही ऐसा पूछ…….
“जापान”
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Very Funny Train SantaBanta Pappu Joke in Hindi
 June 30, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes, Santa Banta Jokes in Hindi
संता बंता ट्रेन(Train) में जा रहे थे ,
सामने वाली सीट पे पप्पू बैठ था ,
संता ने उसे परेशान करने की सोची ,
संता बंता से – इस ट्रेन की चेन खींचने पे क्या होगा ,
बंता – 500 रुपये जुर्माना देना पड़ेगा ,
संता -मेरे पास 300 है ,
तेरे पास कितना है ,
बंता -200 हैं ,ओके
संता ने चेन खींच दी ,
संता -अब देखो मेरा कमाल ,
पुलिस -चेन किसने खींची ,
बंता – इस पप्पू ने ,
पुलिस(पप्पू से) – तुमने चेन खींची ?
पप्पू – हाँ ,
इन दोनों संता बंता ने मिलकर मेरे 500 रूपये छीन लिए इसलिए चेन खींची ,
पुलिस ने दोनों से 500 रुपये छीन कर पप्पू को दे दिए ,
पप्पू rocks
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Railway Station Joke in Hindi
 June 12, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes, Santa Banta Jokes in Hindi
संता ट्रेन से सफर कर रहा था ,
ट्रेन एक स्टेशन पे कुछ देर के लिए रुकी ,
संता ने जल्दी से आवाज देकर पप्पू को बुलाया , बोला –
यार इस स्टेशन पे गाड़ी बस थोड़ी देर के लिए ही रूकती है ,
इसीलिए मैं नहीं उतर रहा ,
ये ले 20 रुपये और मेरे लिए भाग कर वो सामने वाली दुकान से
4 कचौड़ी ले आ और 2 तू खा लेना ,
2 मेरे लिए लेते आना ,
जैसे ही ट्रेन चलने लगी ,
पप्पू भागा हुआ आया और बोला –
उसके पास बस 2 ही कचौड़ी थी ,
वो मैंने खा ली ,
ये तो 10 रुपये वापस ,
संता बेहोश
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Pappu Teacher Lesson Joke in Hindi, Kids Childhood Joke
 June 12, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes, student jokes in Hindi, Teacher Hindi Jokes
पप्पू अपना लेसन (Lesson) याद करके नहीं आया ,
टीचर – अपना लेसन याद क्यों नहीं किया ?
पप्पू – जी मेम ,
कल रात को जैसे ही पढ़ने बैठा ,
लाइट चली गयी ,
टीचर – तो फिर लाइट नहीं आई क्या ?
पप्पू – आई , पर फिर से जैसे ही पढ़ने बैठा फिर चली गयी ,
टीचर – अरे तो फिर लाइट नहीं आई क्या ?
पप्पू – आई थी लेकिन मैं फिर इस डर से पढ़ने नहीं बैठा ,
कि फिर से ना चली जाये
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Pappu Mobile Caller Tune Song in Hindi
 June 10, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू रात को बड़ी गहरी नींद में सो रहा था ,
अचानक उसका फोन बजा ,
उसने नींद में में फ़ोन उठाया ,
एक लड़की बोली –
मैं तैनूं समझावां की, न तेरे बिना लगदा जी..
पप्पू जल्दी से उठा और बोला –
क्या तुम मुझसे शादी करोगी ?
लड़की – इस गाने को अपनी कॉलर ट्यून बनाने के लिए 5 दबाएँ
पप्पू बेहोश
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Pappu Cigarette Smoking Joke in Hindi
 June 4, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू अपनी माँ बाप के साथ होटल में खाना खाने गया ,
वहाँ एक आदमी सिगरेट पी रहा था ,
पप्पू -भाई साहब सिगरेट बाहर जाकर पियें ,
हमारे parents हमारे साथ हैं ,
आदमी – तो क्या हुआ ?
पप्पू – तो साले ,
मेरा भी मन कर रहा है पीने का
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हिंदी चुटकुला , Very Funny Propose Joke in Hindi
 May 29, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू ने बड़ी हिम्मत करके एक लड़की को प्रोपोज़ कर दिया ,
लड़की – तेरी गर्लफ्रेंड बनने से अच्छा है कि
आत्महत्या कर लूँ ,
पप्पू – मर जाएगी ,
पर गरीब का भला नहीं कर सकती
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पप्पू फाडू जोक, Killer Pappu Joke in Hindi
 May 29, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
टीचर(पप्पू से )- बेटा आज घर जाना और सबसे कहना की ,
मुझे सब पता है,
पप्पू (पापा से)- पापा मुझे सब पता है ,,
पापा (डरते हुए)- अरे बेटा वो काम वाली तो बस कभी कभी मुझसे मिलने आती है ,
ये ले 100 रुपये किसी से ना कहना ,
पप्पू को कुछ समझ नहीं आया ,
पप्पू (मम्मी से)- मम्मी मुझे सब पता है ,
मम्मी – बेटा ये लो 200 रुपये ,
रामू काका तो बस रूम की सफाई के लिए आते हैं ,
पप्पू (रामू काका से)- काका मुझे सब पता है ,
सुनते ही रामू ने पप्पू को गले से लगा लिया ,
रामू काका (रोते हुए)- पप्पू सब जानते हुए भी ,
अपने पापा को गले नहीं लगाएगा बेटे
पप्पू बेहोश ,,
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Pappu Girl Friends Dating Joke in Hindi
 May 25, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू गर्लफ्रेंड के साथ चिप्स खा रहा था ,
लड़की ने पप्पू की आँख में आँखे डाल कर पूछा –
क्या देख रहे हो ?
पप्पू – कमीनी ,तू मुझसे ज्यादा चिप्स खा रही है
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Judge Court Funny SMS Hindi
 May 22, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू को अदालत में पेश किया गया ,
जज – अरे ये क्या ?
तुम 1 हफ्ते में 10 चोरियां कर चुके हो ,,
पप्पू – क्या करूँ जज साहब ,
बचपन से ही काफी मेहनती हूँ
Pappu Hindi Jokes
Pappu Funniest Joke in Hindi
 May 21, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
जाड़े में एक लड़की बस स्टॉप पे खड़ी थी ,
पप्पू बाइक लेकर वहाँ से निकलता है ,
अचानक वापस आया , और लड़की से बोला-
मुझे पहचाना ?
लड़की (गुस्से से)- नहीं ,
पप्पू – क्या यार , अभी तो सामने से गया था ,
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Samosa Pappu Killer Joke in Hindi
 May 19, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू समोसा खा रहा था ,
पप्पू – भैया समोसे अच्छे नहीं बने आज ,
कल वाले बहुत अच्छे थे ,
लाला जी – क्या बात कर रहे हो ,
ये कल वाले ही तो हैं..
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Shopkeeper Funny Joke SMS in Hindi
 May 17, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू दुकानदार के पास गया ,
बोला – लाला जी मैं आपकी दुकान से मुर्गी का दाना खरीद के ले गया था ,
याद है ,
लाला जी – हाँ याद है ,
पप्पू – वो दाना एक दम बेकार निकला ,
लाला जी – क्यों ?
पप्पू – क्यों क्या , पिछले महीने खेत में डाला था ,
अभी तक एक भी मुर्गी पैदा नहीं हुई
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Pappu ki Girl Friend, Kaun Banega Karorpati(Billionaire) Joke
 May 17, 2015  admin
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 girl friend boy friend jokes, Pappu Hindi Jokes
पप्पू ने अपनी गर्लफ्रेंड को फोन किया ,
फोन पापा ने उठा लिया ,
पप्पू मन में बोला – हे भगवान ये कहाँ से आ गया ,
पापा – हेलो कौन बोल रहा है ?
पप्पू – मैं “कौन बनेगा करोड़पति ” से अमिताभ बच्चन बोल रहा हूँ ,
आपकी बेटी की सहेली मेरे सामने हॉट सीट पर बैठी है ,
अपनी बेटी को फ़ोन दीजिये सर ,
पापा ने जल्दी से फोन बेटी को दे दिया ,
पप्पू – सवाल ये है कि आज शाम तुम कहाँ मिलोगी ,
option A – मंदिर के पीछे ,
option B – कॉलेज में ,
option C – बाजार में ,
option D -मेरे घर पे ,
लड़की (शरमाकर)- option A ,
पप्पू – ok धन्यवाद ,
बापू खुशी से फूला नहीं समा रहा था ,
पप्पू rock
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Pappu Insult Joke in Party
 May 12, 2015  admin
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 girl friend boy friend jokes, Insult Joke SMS in Hindi, Pappu Hindi Jokes
एक शानदार पार्टी चल रही थी ,
तभी एक सुन्दर सी लड़की पप्पू के पास आई ,
बोली – excuse me ,
मेरे हाथ में खाने की प्लेट है तो क्या आप ,
मेरी टी -शर्ट से एक चीज़ हटा सकते हैं ,
पप्पू (खुश होकर)- हाँ बोलो क्या हटाना है ?
लड़की – अपनी कुत्ते जैसी नजर
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Pappu ke Funny Jokes Chutkule
 May 11, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
एक हवाई जहाज तूफान में फंस गया ,
पप्पू उसका कप्तान था ,
पप्पू – किसी को तूफान से बचने की दुआ आती है ,
एक बाबा जी बैठे थे ,
बाबा(खुश होकर) – हाँ मुझे आती है ,
पप्पू – ठीक है ,
तुम अपने लिए दुआ पढ़ो क्युकी एक पैराशूट कम है
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Sundar Ladki, Beautiful Girl & Pappu Joke in Hindi
 May 10, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
एक बार पप्पू चोरी के लिए एक घर में घुसा ,
खट -पट की आवाज़ सुनकर कमरे में लेटी लड़की की आँख खुल गयी ,
सुन्दर लड़की ने पप्पू से कहा – सुनिए ,
पप्पू लड़की के पास गया ,,
लड़की ने संदूक की चाबी पप्पू को देते हुए कहा –
सारा माल इस संदूक में है ये लो चाबी और ले जाओ ,
लेकिन जाने से पहले मेरी दुःख भरी कहानी सुनते जाओ ,
पप्पू -चलो माल तो मिल गया , कहानी सुनने में क्या जाता है ,,
लड़की – कल मेरे पति की मौत हो गयी मैं अकेली रह गयी ,
लड़की जोर से चिल्लाई – हाय रिजवान , हाय रिजवान तुम मुझे छोड़ कर कैसे चले गए ,
बगल के कमरे में लेटे लड़की के पति की आँख खुल गयी ,
पप्पू को कुछ समझ नहीं आया ,
अचानक पीछे से रिजवान पहलवान कमरे में दाखिल हुआ ,
और पप्पू को गर्दन पकड़ के उठाया ,
और इतना पटका ,इतना पटका ,इतना पटका ,
पप्पू – साला चोरी करूँगा , पर जिंदगी में कभी कहानी नहीं सुनूँगा
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Pappu Bus Accident Joke in Hindi
 May 5, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes
एक बस खाई में जा गिरी ,
ड्राइवर का हाथ बुरी तरह काट गया ,
वो जोर जोर से चिल्ला रहा था – हाय मेरा हाथ ,,
पप्पू – अबे क्यों चिल्ला रहा है ,उस आदमी को देख बेचारे की गर्दन कट गई ,
फिर भी शांति से लेता है
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राहुल गाँधी पप्पू हिंदी चुटकुले
 April 30, 2015  admin
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 Pappu Hindi Jokes, Rahul Gandhi Jokes in Hindi
राहुल गाँधी स्कूल से रोते हुए लौटा ,
सोनिया – क्या हुआ बेटा, क्यों रो रहे हो ?
राहुल – मैडम ने बहुत मारा ,
सोनिया – पर क्यों , जरूर तूने ही कोई गड़बड़ की होगी ?
राहुल (रोते हुए)- कसम से मम्मी , मैंने कुछ नहीं किया ,
मै तो चुपचाप सो रहा था
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Exam Result Very Very Funny Joke in Hindi
 April 29, 2015  admin
 1 Comment 
Exam Jokes in Hindi, Father Jokes in Hindi, Pappu Hindi Jokes
बाप – इतने कम मार्क्स ,
दो थप्पड़ मारने चाहिए ,,
पप्पू – हाँ पापा जल्दी चलो मैंने उस साले
मास्टर का घर भी देख रखा है

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biggest desi Hindi jokes collection of latest desi boyfriend and sardar girls girlfriend and above

biggest desi Hindi jokes collection of latest desi boyfriend and sardar girls girlfriend and above

Neela daant…
One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?
Two: Yaar maine ink lagayi hai.
One: Woh kyun.?
Two: Kyun ke aaj kal “bluetooth” ka zamana hai yaar…
Comments(11) | |
Long celebration
Wife: Woh admi jo drink kar raha hai, Usko maine 10 saal pehle shadi ke liye inkaar kia tha. Dekho who aaj tak sharab pee raha hai!
Husband: Wow! itni lambi celebration!
Comments(7) | |
I was born in Punjab!
Boss: Where were you born ?
Sardarji: Oye Punjab .
Boss: Which part?
Sardarji: Oye, Kya which part? Whole body born in Punjab.
Comments(61) | |
Kya Tum Ek Haath Se…
Ek ladki apny boy friend k sath nai car main long drive par ja rahi thi achanak ladki kehnay lagi, “suno ! kya tum ek haath se garri chala saktay ho ?”
“Kyun nahi” ,ladkay ne baday fakher se kaha.
Ladki ne aahista se kaha, “to phir doosray haath se apni naak saaf kar lo.”
Comments(6) | |
Gadhe ki baat
Ek sahebji ghabraye hue aaye aur biwi se bole: “Begam, aaj main office se aa raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…!”
Itne mein unki bachhi bol uthi: “Mummy, Shyam ne meri gudiya tod di hai.” Pati ne phir kehna shuru kiya “Haan toh begam, main keh raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…..!”
Itne mein unka ladka bola: “Mummy, Rita ne meri car tod di hai.”
Biwi ghusse mein aakar boli: “Bhagwan ke liye tum sab chup ho jao, mujhe pehle gadhe ki baat sun lene do..!”
Banta goes to watch dance
Banta mujra dekhne gaya, Sari raat mujra dekhta raha
Bai: Saheb humne aap ko khush kiya, Ab aap hamein khush karo.
Toh banta utha aur khud nachne laga .
Comments(13) | |
Gabbar ka khauf…
Maa apne bete se kehti: Beta so ja warna
gabbar aa jayega.
Beta apni maa se kehta: Maa mujhe
Chocolate do varna papa se keh dunga ke mere sone ke bad roz gabbar aata hai.
Comments(26) | |
Bahana nahi chahiae
Sardar: Mere podho ko pani de ramu.
Ramu: Sir barish gir rahi hai!
Sardar: Bahana nahi chahiae, chata leke ja…
Comments(11) | |
Submitted by: shiv
Innocence at its best
Ek chote bacche ne apani pregnant mummy se pucha : Isme kya hai?
Mummy : Issme pyara sa Baby hai.
Baccha : Itana pyara tha to khaya kyu ussko?
Comments(28) | |
Submitted by: Rasika
Bura mat socho
Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?
Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!
Nutrition
Ek 10 saal ka bachha bahot dhyan se ek book pad raha tha, jiska title tha: “ Kids ka paalan poshan kaise kare” .
Mother: Tum yeh book kyon pad rahe ho.
Kid: Main yeh dekhna chahta hoon ke
mera paalan poshan theek tara se ho raha hai ya nahi.
Comments(19) | |
Tala ka maamla
Ek sharabi ne bahut zyada sharab pee le. Jab woh ghar aaya to uss ne jeb se chabi nikali aur tala ko kholney laga.
Haath kaapne ke wajha se chabi kabhi idhar hat jati kabhi udhar hat jati, ek admi pass se guzra toh sharabi ne usey bataya ki tala nahi khul rahi hai.
Uss shaks ne sharabi ke pass ja kar kaha, “lao chabi tala main khol deta hoon”
Aur phir sharabee ne kaha, “Tala toh main hi kholonga bas tum makan ko pakar ke rakhna”
Comments(21) | |
colony ka bhikari
Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.
Saheb : Kal aana. Kal
Bhikhari: Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon rupaye fase huye hain.
Comments(15) | |
Submitted by: sahid
Pappu aur Pinki
Pappu Pinko ko pasand karta hay, aur Pinki Pappu k bhai ko… Jab k Pappu k bhai ko Pinki ki behan achi lagti hai aur Pinki ki behan ko Pappu pasand karti hai.
Halan-k Pappu pehle hi Pinki ko chahta hai…. Ab jab-k Pinko ko Pappu acha nahin lagta aur Pappu ka bhai Pinki k liye razi nahi hay aur Pappu Pinki ki behan se pyar nahin karta jab k Pinki ki behan ko Pappu ka bhai acha nahin lagta… To ye unka personal problem hay.
Aap kyon apna dimag kharab ker rahe ho!!!
Comments(42) | |
New doctor
Nayi(new) doctor ne apni life ka pehla operation kiya! Operation ki thodi der baad hi marij mar gaya!
Marij ke marne ke baad doctor ne diwar par tangi bhagwan ki taswir ki ore haath jodkar sir jhukate hue puri shradha ke saath kaha: Hey prabhu meri ore se yeh
pehli bhet swikar kijiye!
Tumhe phansi hogi
Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phansi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha ha ha!
Police: Kyu hass rahe ho?
Sardar: Main toh subah 8 baje tak sota hoon!
Comments(14) | |
Bada faayda
Husband: Tumse shaadi karke mujhe ek bahut bada faayda hua hai!
Wife: Woh kya?
Husband: Mujhe mere gunaaho ki saza jeete jee hi mil gayi!
Comments(7) | |
Ritu bomb hai
Ek baar ek terrorist ne Ritu ke ghar mein bomb rakh diya.
Log chillaye : Ritu bomb hai, Ritu bomb hai.
Ritu sambhal kar boli : Dhatt teri ki, woh toh mein jawani mein thi !! Ab nahi rahi.
Comments(16) | |
Submitted by: Lara
Roopvati, Gunvati and Dhanvati
Dad : The girl whom I showed you is
roopvati, gunvati and dhanvati . So you should marry her.
Son : But the girl whom I love is roopvati, dhanvati and garbhvati so I must marry her.
Comments(45) | |
Not in duty
Ek police Inspector ke ghar chori ho rahi thi.
Wife: Utho ji, ghar mein chori ho rahi hai.
Police Inspector: Mujhe sone de, main iss time duty par nahi hoon.
Hansa-Praful Part-II
Hansa: Praful, alphabet matlab….
Praful: alphabet Hansa, local train mein safar karte hoye maasi jaise hi koi seat khali dekhti hai, to wo apni beti Alpha se kya kehti hai?
Hansa: Alpha beth seat pe, Alpha beth,acha toh yeh alphabet….
Comments(4) | |
Love forever
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear!
Girl: Would you die for me ?
Boy: No, mine is Undying Love!
Comments(0) | |
Chinese made easy
Here’s the simplified version of Chinese language. A lot of things make sense here. Do check it out and try to understand them:
Wai U Shao Ting — There is no reason to raise your voice.
Chin Tu Fat – You need a face lift
Dum Gai – A stupid person
Gun Pao Der – An ancient Chinese invention
Hu Flung Dung – Which one of you fertilized the field?
Kum Hia – Approach me
Shai Gai – A self-conscious person
Wan Bum Lung – A person with T.B.
Wai So Dim – Are you trying to save electricity?
Tai Ne Po Ne – A small horse,
Tai Ne Bae Be - A premature infant
Comments(0) | |
Three patients
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.
If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an
empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.
“Congratulations! You’re a free man. Just tell me why didn’t you jump?” asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, “Well Doc, I can’t swim!”
Comments(2) | |
Submitted by: SANGEETASHETTY
Modernization
Girl of 1960 : Aye bahar hai…jia bekarar hai… aja moray balma tera intezar hai .
Girl of 2007 : Aye bahar hai…jia bekarar hai… aje moray balma warna dusra tayyar hai.

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desi Hindi jokes collection of mahabharat teachers students sardar girls girlfriend beta papa mummy husband wife and above

desi Hindi jokes collection of mahabharat teachers students sardar girls girlfriend beta papa mummy husband wife and above

Doubt about Mahabharata
In a remote village of India, once Masterji is teaching the Mahabharat katha to class 6 students. He is at the ‘Krishna janma’ part of it.
Masterji : “Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister’s 8th child is going to kill him. He was furious. He ordered to put Vasudev and Devki behind the bars. First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning… Second one is born n Kansa throws him off the mountain peak. Third one is born…
Ramu : I have a doubt (sounding nervous and confused).
Masterji : “Ramu bete, whole India does not have doubt in Mahabharata then how come you have one?”
Ramu : Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki’s 8th child was going to Kill him, “Why the hell did he put Vasudev and Devaki in the same cell?”
Masterji fainted.
Sesh naag ki godh
Husband wife ki godh mein leta hua tha. Aur wife ne pyaar se apne husband se puchha:
Wife: Kaisa lag raha hai ji.
Husband: Aise, jaise bhagwaan Vishnu Shesh naag ki godh mein lete hon.
Why’s Santa’s phone OFF bhai??
Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said ‘Switched Off’ !
Banta : Nahi Pape, it’s my HELLO TUNE !
Black baby
Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida hua toh woh kala tha.
Tabhi woh apni patni ke paas jata hai aur poochta hai, “Yaar main bhi gora tha tum bhi gori thi to bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya”
Aur phir uski biwi ne jawab diya, “Darling main bhi hot tum bhi hot sayad bachcha jal gaya hoga.”
Gadhe ki baat
Ek sahebji ghabraye hue aaye aur biwi se bole: “Begam, aaj main office se aa raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…!”
Itne mein unki bachhi bol uthi: “Mummy, Shyam ne meri gudiya tod di hai.” Pati ne phir kehna shuru kiya “Haan toh begam, main keh raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…..!”
Itne mein unka ladka bola: “Mummy, Rita ne meri car tod di hai.”
Biwi ghusse mein aakar boli: “Bhagwan ke liye tum sab chup ho jao, mujhe pehle gadhe ki baat sun lene do..!”
Bada faayda
Husband: Tumse shaadi karke mujhe ek bahut bada faayda hua hai!
Wife: Woh kya?
Husband: Mujhe mere gunaaho ki saza jeete jee hi mil gayi!
Chhota bartan…
Customer: Ek kilo gaay(cow) ka doodh dena.
Shopkeper: Lekin tumhara bartan toh bahut chhota hai.
Customer: Theek hai toh phir bakri ka de de
Machcher ko maar daal
Malik alsi nokar se: - Yahan par itne sare machcher gun-gun kar rahen hai tu unhe maar gira.
Thodi der bad
Malik:- Abe sale nokar ke bachche maine tujhe machcher marne ko kaha abhi tak tune mare nahi. Woh ab bhi gun-guna kar rahe hai
Alsi nokar:- Malik machcher toh maine maar diye. Yeh toh unki bibi hai jo vidhva ho kar ro rahi hai.
New doctor
Nayi(new) doctor ne apni life ka pehla operation kiya! Operation ki thodi der baad hi marij mar gaya!
Marij ke marne ke baad doctor ne diwar par tangi bhagwan ki taswir ki ore haath jodkar sir jhukate hue puri shradha ke saath kaha: Hey prabhu meri ore se yeh
pehli bhet swikar kijiye!
If you will try to kiss
Girl : If you will try to kiss me main shor macha dungi
Boy : Lekin yahan to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl : I know per formality to karni hi padegi.
Dead Body Cycling
During an English lesson , the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him.
Teacher: Pappu, join these two sentences together. I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body.
Pappu: (thinking for a while) I saw a dead body cycling to school.
Comments(6) | |
Chota Santa buys sabji
Chota Santa stopped by the corner grocery store and read the following list to the Sabji wala:
10 kilo sugar at Rs 1.25 a kilo
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each
“How much does that come to? ” asked Larry.
“Twenty-two rupees and thirty-six paisa.”
“If I gave you three ten rupee bills, how much change would I get?” said Chota Santa.
“Seven rupees and sixty-four paisa, ” stated the Sabji wala who appeared to be irritated by all the questions.
Chota Santa said, as he disappeared through the door, “ Mujhe ye sab nahi kharid ne ka he.. mujhe to bas apne kal ke math homework ka an“
Comments(5) | |
Jor se bolo…
Teacher : ‘A’ for?
Student : Apple !!!
Teacher : Jor se bolo…
Student : JAI MATA DI
Comments(22) | |
Submitted by: Samir Khan
Ye Toh Girls Hostel Hai
Child : Mom isbar hum sare patake is shop se lenge.
Mom : lekin beta ye toh girls hostel hai.
Child : Papa to kehte hai ki sari phuljadiya yahi raheti hai.
Comments(13) | |
Submitted by: Imtiaz
A Poor Family Essay
A teacher once asks all students to write an essay on the topic “A Poor Family”. One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay . The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as
Maa banne wali hoon
Ek bar ek chitti ne Hathani ke kan mein kuch kaha toh hathni behos ho gayi.
Phir kisine chitti se pucha ke tune kya kaha?
Chitti Boli : Maine itna hi kaha ke “Main
tumhare bacche ki maa banne wali hoon!”
Comments(16) | |
Submitted by: prakash
Larki mehnati hoti hai
Research ke mutabiq larkian larkon se zyada mehnati hoti hai
Aapko pata hai kaise??
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Nahi pata
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Main bata deta hoon aapko
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- Continue Reading »
Comments(175) | |
Aisa chaukidaar chahiye jo…
Officer: Dekho, humme aisa chaukidaar chahiye jo sehatmand ho , chust, chalak aur chaukanna ho, jarurat parne par jisse hum daat bhi saake…
Yadi tumhare andar yeh saare guun shamil hai to tumhe yeh naukri mil sakti hai.
Umeedwaar : Saheb yeh saare gun meri biwi mein hai, usse bulau?
Comments(7) | |
Sardar and Hidden Camera
Jasmeet caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.
Jasmeet : “What are you searching for?”
Santa : “Hidden camera!”
Jasmeet : “And what makes you think that there are hidden camera here?”
Santa : “That guy on tv knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying, You are watching the Star World channel. How does he know that?”
Comments(14) | |
Ek train mein kuch budhyijibi
Delhi se Mughalsarai jaanewali ek train mein kuch budhyijibi type ke log sawar thy..
Woh log jor jorse antarrashtriya stor ke batien kar rahe thhe.
Upar ke birth par so rahe ek brahmin ko bahut pareshani ho rahi thhi.
Batien karte karte ek sajjan bole , “pahle punjibaad aya, fir samyabaad aur aab samajbaad ayega.”
Tabhi upar se woh vyakti chillaya , “bhaisaab jab Ilahabaad aye to mujhe thora jaga dena !!!”

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Latest desi Hindi jokes collection sweet desi Hindi jokes of bhai and above

Latest desi Hindi jokes collection sweet desi Hindi jokes of bhai and above

Aey Bhai!!!
Munna : Abay Circuit! Jaa baajo walay ghar say Doctor ko bula k laa, meri tabiat kharab ho reli hai.
Circuit : Aey Bhai!!! aap to khud doctor ho.
Munna : Bolay to meri fees bahut zyada hai.
Comments(26) | |
Submitted by: Aamir
Kharab sangat ka asar
Wife: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.
Husband: Kya bataoon, sab galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.
Comments(7) | |
Murgha boyfriend
Ek larka apni girlfriend se milne gaya, kuch baat ke baad uski girlfirend chaye(tea) banane ke liye kitchen chali gayi.
Girlfriend ka mobile sofay pe dekh kar larky ne socha ke chalo dekhte hai mera number iss ne kis naam se save kya hai?
Dear, sweetu ya jaanu.
Jab usne misscall di toh screen pe likh raha tha “Murgha No.5? Calling”.
Comments(52) | |
A Sardarji went to toilet ten times
A Sardarji went to toilet ten times within half-an-hour.
Somebody asked, “Sardarji aapko chain nahin hai kya?”
Sardar : Hai to sahi, par khul nahin rahi!
Comments(14) | |
Kya Tum Ek Haath Se…
Ek ladki apny boy friend k sath nai car main long drive par ja rahi thi achanak ladki kehnay lagi, “suno ! kya tum ek haath se garri chala saktay ho ?”
“Kyun nahi” ,ladkay ne baday fakher se kaha.
Ladki ne aahista se kaha, “to phir doosray haath se apni naak saaf kar lo.”
Samne tha Bus Stop
A policeman caught a Pathan driver stopping the bus at the road and began asking questions:
Policeman: “Tumne bich road pe bus Kyun rok di?”
Pathan: Hum seher mein naya aaya hai magar Kanoon nahi torta! Woh samne dekho likha hai “Bus Stop” Toh humne rok diya :p
Comments(9) | |
Kya Tum Ek Haath Se…
Ek ladki apny boy friend k sath nai car main long drive par ja rahi thi achanak ladki kehnay lagi, “suno ! kya tum ek haath se garri chala saktay ho ?”
“Kyun nahi” ,ladkay ne baday fakher se kaha.
Ladki ne aahista se kaha, “to phir doosray haath se apni naak saaf kar lo.”
Comments(6) | |
Stupid answers
If you have two agarbattis on a boat but no source of fire. How will you light an agarbattis if you are in the middle of the river?”
Some answers are:
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- Continue Reading »
Comments(322) | |
Mayawati came to Lalu’s house
Mayawati came to Lalu’s house with a goat…
Lalu : Bhaiswa ko kyun layi ho?
Maya : Dikhta nahi, goatwa hai.
Lalu : Hum goatwa se hi puch raha hu!!!
Comments(26) | |
Meri toh ho gayi hai
Santa: Main ek baar jungle mein susu karne gaya toh waha per Sher tha.
Banta: Phir kya hua?
Santa: Maine Sher se kaha, “Pehle tum karlo, mera toh ho gaya hai.”
Done-dana-dan
Teacher to a student: “Ess line ki english banao- Usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gaya.”
Student – He done his work and done-dana-dan done-dana-dan .
Comments(16) | |
Begum wife
Two married friends Rahul and Rohan talking on the topic of the married woman,
Rahul: Wife ko begum kyun kehte hai?
Rohan: Kyuki shaadi ke baad uske saare gum husband ke hisse mein chale jaate hai aur wife begum ho jaati hai…
Comments(26) | |
Submitted by: Nayna
Gabbar ka khauf…
Maa apne bete se kehti: Beta so ja warna
gabbar aa jayega.
Beta apni maa se kehta: Maa mujhe
Chocolate do varna papa se keh dunga ke mere sone ke bad roz gabbar aata hai.
Comments(26) | |
Plastic surgery
Ek aadmi bada dukhi tha!
Ek dost ne uss se poocha, “Kyu, tension mein ho.”
Aadmi: Yaar ek dost ko plastic surgery ke liye 2 lakh rupeey diye thay, ab saale ko peehchan nahi pa raha hoon!
Comments(20) | |
Mayawati came to Lalu’s house
Mayawati came to Lalu’s house with a goat…
Lalu : Bhaiswa ko kyun layi ho?
Maya : Dikhta nahi, goatwa hai.
Lalu : Hum goatwa se hi puch raha hu!!!
Gadha ka aashirwaad
Ek baar ek ladka rastey mein chalte chalte ek gadhe ke samne gir gaya.
Tabhi ek ladki ne use chhedte hue kaha, “Apne bade bhai ka aashirwaad le rahe ho kya?”
Ladke ne palat kar jawab diya, “Sahi farmaya bhabhi ji.”
Comments(13) | |
Submitted by: rahul
Bond and a Telgu guy
James Bond and a Telgu guy fly to Newyork in a flight. Telgu guy takes the initiative to converse with James Bond.
Telgu guy asks the name of Bond.
Bond says: Bond! James Bond! James Bond 007!
And Bond asks Telgu Guy’s name.
Telgu Guy replies: Prasad! Venkat Prasad!
Veera Venkat Prasad! Sai Veera Venkat Prasad! Srilakshmi Sai Veera Venkat Prasad!
Venkateshwara Srilakshmi Sai Veera Venkat Prasad! Srinivasukala Venkateshwara Srilakshmi
Sai Veera Venkat Prasad!
Sita Ramanjaneyula Srinivasula Venkateshwara Srilakshmi Sai Veera Venkat Prasad!
Comments(24) | |
Roopvati, Gunvati and Dhanvati
Dad : The girl whom I showed you is
roopvati, gunvati and dhanvati . So you should marry her.
Son : But the girl whom I love is roopvati, dhanvati and garbhvati so I must marry her.
Comments(45) | |
Ek train mein kuch budhyijibi
Delhi se Mughalsarai jaanewali ek train mein kuch budhyijibi type ke log sawar thy..
Woh log jor jorse antarrashtriya stor ke batien kar rahe thhe.
Upar ke birth par so rahe ek brahmin ko bahut pareshani ho rahi thhi.
Batien karte karte ek sajjan bole , “pahle punjibaad aya, fir samyabaad aur aab samajbaad ayega.”
Tabhi upar se woh vyakti chillaya , “bhaisaab jab Ilahabaad aye to mujhe thora jaga dena !!!”
Comments(7) | |
Doorbell bajao aur bhago
Ek chota baccha bahut der se ghar ke bahar khada darwaje ki ghanti bajane ki kosish kar raha tha.Toh ek budha aadmi aaya aur kaha:
Budha aadmi: Kya kar rahe ho beta?
Baccha : Uncle, yeh ghanti bajana chahta hoon.
Budha aadmi (ghanti bajake): Yeh lo bajgaya, ab kya hai?
Baccha: Ab bhago!

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Latest Hindi jokes collection sadhu banta again desi Hindi jokes collection

Latest Hindi jokes collection sadhu banta again desi Hindi jokes collection

Main sadhu kyu banta
Ek admi sadhu se bola,
Meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upaya batayien na shadu ji…
Aur phir shadu ghusse me bole ,
Abe saale upaya hota to main sadhu kyu banta..
Comments(7) | |
A for Apple
Banta class mein – madam maine “abc” yaad karli..
Madam -ok , to sunao..
Banta – abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz…..
Madam - arey aise nahi ….aise suna A for apple
Banta – ok madam…. A for apple.
B for bada apple.
C for chhota apple .
D for dusra apple.
E for ek aur apple .
F for fokat ka apple .
G for gol apple .
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple ?
J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple
K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple
L for lena padhega tumko apple
M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple
N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple
O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple
P for peth bhar khaao apple
Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple
R for roz agar khaao tum apple
S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple
T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple
U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple
V for very tasty hai yeh apple
W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple
X for X’mas mei bhii Hi! khana padenge apple
Y for yun na chehra phero dekhkey apple
Z for zaraasa aur khaalo apple aur………..
Comments(81) | |
Pages (34): [1] 2 3 4 » ... Last »
Receive the best jokes...
Tired of all those crappy, "not so funny" old jokes?
We have gone through thousands of jokes and selected only the funniest ones which will definitely make you laugh your ass off.
Santa meets his friend Banta
Santa : A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B…!
Banta : Oye, Iska Matlab ?
Santa : Kuch Nahin Yaar, I Mean Long Time No C..!
Comments(3) | |
Bura mat socho
Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?
Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!
Comments(12) | |
Submitted by: harish
Football show
Laloo to his P.A .: Itne khiladi kyun football ko laat maar rahe hai?
P.A .: Goal kar ne k liye.
Laloo: Susra, ball toh pahle se hi gol hai aur kitna gol karenge!
Comments(25) | |
Opener
Question: Dhoni asks Rohit to bring a Pepsi. Rohit brings the bottle, but takes it directly to Shewag.
Why?
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- Continue Reading »
Comments(94) | |
Blood test
Pathan BLOOD Ke bare mein book parh raha tha
Wife: Aaj yeh book kyu parh rahe ho ji?
Pathan: Mujhe doctor ne kaha hai ke kal mera BLOOD test hai iss liye test ki tayari kar raha hoon.
Larki mehnati hoti hai
Research ke mutabiq larkian larkon se zyada mehnati hoti hai
Aapko pata hai kaise??
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Nahi pata
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Main bata deta hoon aapko
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- Continue Reading »
Comments(175) | |
Gadhe ki baat
Ek sahebji ghabraye hue aaye aur biwi se bole: “Begam, aaj main office se aa raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…!”
Itne mein unki bachhi bol uthi: “Mummy, Shyam ne meri gudiya tod di hai.” Pati ne phir kehna shuru kiya “Haan toh begam, main keh raha tha ki raste mein ek gadha…..!”
Itne mein unka ladka bola: “Mummy, Rita ne meri car tod di hai.”
Biwi ghusse mein aakar boli: “Bhagwan ke liye tum sab chup ho jao, mujhe pehle gadhe ki baat sun lene do..!”
Comments(18) | |
Submitted by: sahid
Husband’s poem on saali
**WARNING**
THIS IS NOT TRUE IN CASE OF EVERY SAALI. AND DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!
Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty
Saali is Pension, Wife is Tension
Saali is Yummy, Wife is Vehmi
Saali is Pataka, Wife is BATAKA
Saali is Cool, Wife is Fool
Saali is Tooti – Fruity, Wife is Kismat Futi
Saali is Fresh cake , Wife is earth QUAKE
*Ek Dukhi Paati.*
Comments(49) | |
Maar padi…
Santa: Yaar aaj pehli bar maine accha kaam kya, jiss par logon ne mujhe bohat mara!
Banta: Woh kya..
Santa: Ek makan mein aag lagi thi, aur andar kuch log thay, maine window tori aur andar ja kar sab logon ko bahar nikal diya.
Banta: Toh logon ne kyun mara
Santa: Yaar, kyun ke woh sab log fire fighter thay!
Comments(25) | |
Chaalu khaata
Chhote: Woh ladki kitni sundar hai!
Bade: Mujhe uska naam pata hai.
Chhote: Kya naam hai uska?
Bade: Woh bank mein kaam karti hai, uske counter ke upar uska naam likha tha “CHAALU KHAATA”

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Latest new smail Hindi Jokes collection of gf bf teachers students sardar Santa banta girls and boys mom wife husband and above

Latest new smail Hindi Jokes collection of gf bf teachers students sardar Santa banta girls and boys mom wife husband and above

Boyfrnd-Main Tumhari Roz-Roz Ki Farmaishon Se Tang Aakar Khudkhushi Kar Raha Hu.
Girlfrnd-Achchha 1White Suit To Dila Do.
BY-Q?
GL-13v Pe Kya Pehnugi?
Apni ankhein band karke mera chehra imagine karein
Kar liya?
OK
Mubarak ho
Aapne 3 din pahle hi
"Eid ka Chand" dekh liya
U R so Lucky:
Techer Ka DarJa MAA Se B Uncha Hota H?
Pta hai
Qki MAA Apni Lori Se Sirf Ek Bache Ko Sulati H Or_Teacher Apne Lctr Se Puri Class Ko sulati h.
2 GOLDEN RULES of life :-)
Rule-1: Ur FRND "Prashant" is always right.
Rule2: whenever u feel
"Prashant" is wrong, slap urself & read rule no.1 again...:-
Teacher: 1 din aisa ayega jab Prithvi par Pani nhi rahega, Jeev jantu nasht ho jayenge,Prithvi tabaah ho jayegi..
Sardar: Sir to kya us din school aana hai??
Agar Koi Ladki Ghar me B Make up laga kar Ghume to Samjo
.
.
.
.
Ki
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.
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.
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Uska Mobile Phone 3G Hai!!
Gf- main kisi aur se shadi kr rhi hun, mujhe bhul jao.
bf - na tere aane ki khusi na tere jaane ka gum....
ja behen ja... Dusri pata lenge hum.......
A rabbit runs, jumps and lives only for 15 years!
A turtle doesn't run,does nothing,yet lives for 300 or more years!
Moral: EXRCISE IS HELL!
SLEEP WELL..
Shakespeare once said:
"I'm going to washroom!!"
Tum kya samjhay? :P
Oye yarr Shakespeare aam batein b krta tha
Hr time quotes nai marta tha!
Are O friendwa...!
Kaisan ho.?
Kauno baat pe naraj ho ka.?
Tohar smswa k darshan kiye kafi samay bit gawa re.
Tanik ek-dui sms wa bhijwai do hamar TunTuniya pe.
Kid-mom did u c me b4 i was born?
Mom-no i didn't
kid-den after i was born how did u know its me?
.
Such kids bcum external examiners 4 viva!:-)
:: Jokes and sms in Hindi ::
Boy- Tumhari kameez fati Hui Hai
Girl- nahi Ye Fashion ha
Boy- Acha Khud Faado toh Fashion
Hum Faade Toh POLICE STATION?
:: jokes and sms in Hindi ::
Height of Job satisfaction-
A boy got a job in girls hostel...
After 2 months owner asked: Y u don't come 2 take ur salary?
Boy: KYA..?
salary bhi milegi..!
:: jokes and sms ::
Apni Pasand ka koi 1 Fruit Choose Karo
.
Apple
Lemon
0range
Mango
Banana
Chery
.
.
Or rply mt krna, Kharid Kr
Kha Lena.
Fruits r good 4 health...!
Tweet
24
:: jokes and sms ::
1 pathan 2sre pathan se!
Yar suna he 2012 tk duniya khatm hojye gi
2sra pathan:
Asa nhi hoga me ne kal washing machine khridi hy us pe 2014 tk ki guarnty h.
:: Jokes for sms ::
Wo MsG TuMNe MuJHe ABHi BHeJa THa Wo DuBaRa BHeJo PLZ..!
CoNFuSeD?
KaBHi KoI MsG BHeJa H Jo DuBaRa BHeJoGe
"KaNJus" ! !
:-p
:: Jokes for sms ::
story: once a boy was smoking at airport.
Girl asked:1 din me kitne cigrete peete ho.?
Boy:why.?
Girl: Agar ab tak zindagi mein cirgrete pe kharch kiye huye paise bachate to samne khari hui car tmhari hoti...
Boy: Ap cigrate peeti hai..?
Girl: No.
Boy: To kya wo car apki hai..?
Girl: No.
Boy: Thanks for advice,
Wo car meri he hai...
MORAL: zyada lecture dene se bezti bhi ho jati hai ..
:: short jokes sms in Hindi ::
Aap sochte honge k hm Itne msg kyu krte h?
Ans:Bharatiy Shiksha Abhiyan k antargat Aap ko roz kuchh na kuchh padhna jaruri h
"Padhega India,Tabhi badhega
:: mobile jokes sms in Hindi ::
Girl- Main jb bhi phon krti hu tum Shaving kr rhe hote ho,
Din me kitni baar shaving krte ho?
Boy- 30-40 baar.
Girl- pagal ho kya?
Boy- pagal nahi NAAI hu.
:: mobile jokes sms in Hindi ::
Na Aasman Fata, Na Dharti Hili
Fir Apne Kaise Socha Humare Msg Se Mukti Mili
Are Hum Zara Se Busy Kya Huye Ki
Apne Maan Liya K Ye Musibat To Tali....
:: new sms jokes in Hindi ::
If a Single Teacher Can't Teach All d Subjects,
Then How Can U Expect a Single Student to Learn All Subjects?
Think Hatke!
:: new sms jokes in Hindi ::
Boy- Ro Q rhi ho?
Girl- Mere marks bahut kam aaye hai.
Boy-Bata kitne aye hai?
Girl- Sirf 88 %
Boy- Khuda ka khof kar zalim itne me to 2 ladke pass ho jate
‚‚ Short sms jokes ‚‚
A Girl Dialed Her Own Number From Her Boyfriend's Cell To See Her Name Saved In List Like
Doll Or Sweetie.
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She Was Shocked To See
.
.
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ramu gardener
‚‚ Short sms jokes ‚‚
To the People who hate me:
Dear Haters..
I couldn't help but notice that,
AWESOME ends with "ME"
&
UGLY starts with "U" !
‚‚ short sms jokes in English ‚‚
A Social Msg For My All Friends and brothers:-
.
.
"Don't Drink water without Boiling....
Bcoz fish swim in water without wearing pampers....!!!
Short Sms Jokes
1 dukhi girlfriend ne apne boyfriend ne 1 shayari likhi
Phoolon ka raja,baharon ka shehzada
Dil tod kar chala gaya Kutta, kamina, haraamzada
‚‚ short sms jokes in English ‚‚
"GIRLS are like Bluetooth
u stay close dey stay connected
u go away dey find new device"
‚‚ short sms jokes in English ‚‚
Judge: u r accused 4 rape, so u r fined Rs. 11461,
.
Man: Mylord y exactly Rs. 11461?
.
Judge: Rs. 10000 for rape, 4% vat & 10.2% Entertainment
‚‚ Short sms jokes ‚‚
Girl Friend: Kuch aisa bolo ke mere dil ki dhadkan tez ho jaaye!
.
.
.
Boy Friend: wo dekh tera Baap.
Hosle Sare aazma baithe,
Hum zamane k gam utha baithe,
Jiski Chahat me Umar bhar Tadpe,
Uski hi Shaadi ki Biryani Kha Baithe.
:: latest, new, best, short sms jokes, collection ::
Bahut dur rah kar bhi pass lagte ho
Nazro se dur rehkar bhi khas lagte ho
Har baar dusro ka diya SMS bhejte ho
Aur khud ko “TULSIDAS” samajhte ho
Na muje kisi ka dil chahie..,
Na Muje jmane se koi aas hai..,
Jo apna smjh kr apni saheli ka no dilwa de..
Muje us dost ki talash hai.
:: short sms jokes in Hindi ::
Media: Prince, bahar aa kar acha lag raha hai?
Prince: Kya acha lagega?
Andar choclate thi, pastry thi, milk badam tha.
Thodi der aur ruk jaate shayad Bipasha bhi aa jati....
:: short sms jokes in Hindi ::
Teacher: Agar apna character sudharna hai to sab aurato ko MAA kaha karo.
Student: Madam is se mera character to theek rahega, par mere baap ka bigad jayega...
2 bachay jungle me potti kar rhe thay,achanak sher agaya
1st: chotu tu dar to nahi raha?
2nd: nahi,main nahi darta
1st: to phir apni dho meri Q dho raha hai??
:: short sms jokes in Hindi ::
Bahu- Maji, ye abhi tak nhi aaye, kahi koi dusri aurat?
Saas- Kalmuhi,tu hamesh hi ulta sochti h,aisa bhi to ho sakta h ki ,truck ke niche aa gya ho..!!!
:: short sms jokes ::
2020 me apko customer care ke sms is prakar aayenge.. Dear customer, your wife can become a mother without your struggle.. Just sms "child" to 556677
Jab koi sms ni krta.
itna gussa ata h
dil to chahta h
chapal utar k...
aram se baith jau or
sochu sayad sms bhejna nhi ata hoga.
Teacher: isko sentence ko translate koro-"girl kapde pehen chuki hai."... all boys ek sath me bole-ohhhhh... Shit.... We are late.
Sholey ki team ne IPL me bhag liya,. gabbar ke bowler ne 20 over me 150 run diye aur extra me 200 run diye..batao kyun?.... kyunki wicketkeepar thakur tha
:: New sms jokes ::
Girlfriend- Hamesha meri baat manoge
Mujhe kabhi touch nhi karoge
Kiss nhi karoge..
Boyfriend- behen tu ghar ja..
Tere mummy papa chinta kr rahe honge
:: New sms jokes ::
GIRL TO BOY: Jab tum log girls ko I LOVE YOU kehte ho
to un ka haath Kyu pakad lete ho
BOY: bas apni hifaazat ke liye
kahi thapad na mar de
Mai to yu hi
Paani ko gaur se dekh
raha tha yaaro..
Itne me 1 machhli
nikal k boli..
Kaminey.. Tere ghar me maa behen nahi hai kya..?
:: Humour jokes ::
Chinese ladki ko dekh kar maa boli: Beta, yeh kya le aaye? :-x
Molu: Apne khud hi toh kaha tha,
ke ghar aate huye Cheeni lete aana.
:: New sms jokes ::
GOLU-Mai bahut pareshan hu
MOLU-Q
GOLU-Yaar maine suna hai biwi doli me baith ke jati H or arthi pe jati H Or meri biwi taxi me baith k chali Gyi
:: Latest jokes sms ::
Yaha Har Kisi Ki Zindagi Ka 1 Hai Maqsad Hai..
.
.
.
.
Khud Bhale kameena Ho Lekin ladki Sharif Chaiye
:: Latest jokes sms ::
bhikari: Bahen Bhoka Hu bhagwan KE Naam PE Khana De Do
Behan: Khana Abi Ni Paka
bhikari: FaceBook Pe BABA Pappu K Nam Se H
khana Pak Jae To Wall Pe Update Kar Dena
:: Latest jokes sms ::
Kya farak padta hai chahe
munni badnam ho ya sheela jawan ho
Hum to jawan bhi hai or badnam bhi hai
:: Humour jokes ::
A man saw a board at d centre Of a River,
He tried 2 read
but he can’t read it.
So,he swim into d River &read
“CROCODILE INSIDE-DONT SWIM”
:: Humour jokes ::
Tees mar khan- Flop
Dabang-Hit
Moral-
Ladki jawan hone se kuch nahi hota
Badnam honi chahiye.
:: Great jokes ::
Chunav Lad Rahi Mahila Se Reporter Ne Pucha-
Apko Chunav Ladne Ka Khayal Kaise Aya
Lady- Jab B Me Apne Pati Se Ladti Hu To Jeet Meri Hi Hoti Hai
:: Great jokes ::
BOY - Tumhari AGE kitni hai.
GIRL - 20 year.
BOY - 5 saal pehle bhi to tumne yahi kaha tha.
GIRL - dekha ladkiya apni zuban ki kitni pakki hoti h.
:: latest jokes 2016 ::
What is the similarity between Manmhan Singh & Indian Cricket Team??? . . . . . . Answer: Both have foreign coaches.
:: Jokes of the day ::
Have u seen a monkey wrapped in plastic? No??? Quickly see your id card or driving license.
:: Jokes of the day ::
1 Girl ne 1 chote se baby k gaal pe kiss kiya GRL-oh sory tumhare gaal me lipstick lag gai. Baby-Kuch accha karne se agar daag lagte h to daag achE hai...
:: latest jokes 2016 ::
Biggest Joke on Doctor. . .
Dr. to patient's friend:
Agar 1 ghanta pehle le aate to
hum isey bacha lete. . .
Patient's Friend:
Abay, 15 min pehle tou accident
hua hai.
:: new jokes in hindi 2016 ::
Khoobsurat ladkiyan zyada padhai nahi karti Bcoz wo janti He ke duniya ke kisi kone me koi gadha unke liye engineer ya docter ban raha hoga....
:: clean jokes ::
A Girl siting on a park bench.
Funny Beggar: Hi sweetheart.
She angrily: How dare U call me sweetheart?
Beggar: Then What the HELL R U doing on my BED..
Tumsa koi zamin par hua to rab se shikayat hogi,
tumsa koi zamin par hua to rab se shikayat hogi,
Ek to jhel liya dusra aaya to kayamat hogi.
:: clean jokes ::
Aap Ki Yaad Main Ek Shair Arz Hai.
Today Is somwar, Tommorow Is Manglwar.
Wah Wah
Today Is somwar, Tommorow Is Mangalwar..
I Miss You Yaar
I Miss You Yaar..
‚‚ New jokes 2012‚‚
Ikhtiyar-e-tarnum ki tabassum k taqadus ki ranaiyoon se jahalat ki tariqi ko mita dena. . . . !
Jab iss ka mtlb smjh aaye tou mjhe B bta dena.
‚‚ New jokes 2012‚‚
Hey, tera affair chalu hai & u hvnt told me,
chal jane de i can undrstnd. bt who’s dat?
Agar aise msgs mummy padh le to kitna mazaa aaega..
:: New jokes 2016 ::
Zindgi me jo chiz asani se mile - Dokha
Jo muskil se mile - Kushi
Aur jo bade nasib walo ko mile?
Ab main apni tarif Khud kaise karu…
:: Good jokes in hindi ::
Principle: Late Q Hue
Boy: Bike Khrab Ho Gai Thi
Principle: Bus Me Nahi Aa Skty The
Boy: Maine Kaha Th SIR
Par Apki Beti k Nakhre Khtm Ho Tab Na
Modi Sarkar ke OROP ki ghosna ke baad
Aab Kajiwaal jee ko bhi chahiye ki wo
OPOR(1 palate 1 Raita) ki ghosna kar de
Ab ye afwah/rumors kisne failayi hai
Just after announcement OROP
Some opposition party leaders caught fever
Some hve depression...
Maine Kaha- "I love you"
Girl-Mera Boyfriend hai
Maine Kaha- purana jayega tabhi to naya aayega
OLX par bech de..
haramkhoro 10-20 hajaar ke mobile bana dete ho
kam se kam 2-3 mitre charger ki cable to diya karo
India Team is best team ever
Sabko batting ka moka mila H........world Cup 2015 jokes
Kuch is tarah kambakkht ishq ne meri Izzat ka rayataa bana diya |
me guzara jis gali se, Uske ek thappad ki goonj ne, mughe sare muhalle
ka Kajriwal bana diya...........
Chuki 4 shatako se saabit ho gaya H
ki kohli ghaas wali pich par bhi
Aacha pradarshan kar sakte H
Esiliye aajkal Anushka ne Veet use
karna band kaar diya H
Radio par Modi ji ki 'Mann Ki Baat' programme ki grand success ke
baad ab Rahul ji bhi apna prasaran "Mann Ki Uljhan" me karege
Santa: dost tu itna bada ho gaya aur phir bhi abhi tak tere ko
dadhi- mooch nahi aayi?
Banta : main bilkul apni maa par gaya hoon
wife ko samghna matlap - 50 GB ka video download karna aur
49.5 GB download hone ke baad error dekhana
Aaj Ka Suvichar-
Hum bhartiya sir par helmet pehne na pehne par Smartphones/mobile me screen gaurd jarur lagate h
sir fat jae khoon ki nadia beh jae par mobile ko kharoch tak nahu aani chaiye
1 Best benefit of using "WhatsApp"
ye hai ki us pe bahut sari
Aurate/ladki baat karti hai phir
bhi aawaz nahi hoti hai
In maths exam, Santa got 1question
Prove
Sin x= 6n
Santa cancelled 'n' from both the sides
Then
six=6
&
wrote "Dont mess with Santa d great"
wo dost umar bhar kaya sath denge jo choraha par police ko dekhkar bike se utar diya
Farmaishi geeto ke es karykram me agli farmaish lete h
Delhi se "Arwind jee" ki.......geet ke bol h.........
Sajna hai mughe Dharna ke liye
Dosto.....
Akhir wo samay aa gaya jab hum
Subah uthkar jindgi ka sabse mushkil phesala karte hai
Ki aj nahana hai ya nahi.......................winter special sms for friends
Pichli baar Ghajini Dekhkar Jin Logon Ne Sar Mundwa Liya the
Unke liye Hindi movie PK kisi Agni-pariksha se kaam nahi
Agar free ho to call me pls,
mere phone me bal nai h its urgnt
mujhe aapse ek personal advice leni h.
TajMAHAL Bik rha h Kharid lu kya?
Father: Kya Hua Beta Q Ro Raha Hai Mujhe Bata
Mai Tmhare Dost Jaisa Hu
Son: Kya Batau Mai Apni Wali Se Milne Gya Tha
Teri Wali Ne Bahut Mara.
Kabhi-Kabhi Sochta Hu Ki Apne Aap Ko Mar Dalu..
.
Par
.
Phir Sochta Hu
India Me Sirf 1410 Hi TIGER Bachenge..
Never make the same mistake twice,
There r so many new ones.
Try a different one each day By
.
Swami MISTEKANANDA
Once Rajnikant played FM in mobile
1 Alien came at RAJNI’s home frm sum galaxy n rqustd,
“Mere ladke ki board exams he.thoda dheere bajao na
American culture-
Daughter:
Dad i got married ystrday evenin.. I 4got 2 inform u..
Dad:
Its Ok my child.. But next time u shud invite me…
Boy: Do yu lOve me?
Girl: Yes-
Boy starts running
Gal: where r yu going?
Boy: I’m going to update my relationship status on facebook-
Jaab tum raat sachche dil se sone ki koshish karo to..
Tab Wifi/3G ki tez speed tumhe jagane ki saajish karti hai
Boy-Papa..papa lagta hai Varsa aane wali hai
Papa-tu study kar.. nalayak, sara din bas ladkiyo ki baate karta rahta hai
Son- Papa me life me aage badhne ke liye kaya karu? Papa- Patthar le aur sabse phele ye mobile phor.....new jokes in hindi
:: New jokes in Hindi ::
1 admi ne 100 times khoon daan kark record bnaya
Blood bank walo ne uski wife ko prize diya
ye kehte hue ki
Apne Nahi PiyaTabi to Hmne Liya
:: New jokes in Hindi ::
Bahot sweet hai wo jinhe hum chahte hai,
Hr pal Khuda se usiko mangte he
Dil tarasta he use pane ko
Kya Apka dil nai krta
“Dairy Milk” Khaane ka
:: Nice jokes in Hindi ::
Wish u a very happy married life…
aise kya ghoor rhe ho..
ph. mera, pese mere, sms mera,
to mrji b meri, jo chahe beju, tum shadi k bad pd lena..
Aaj Boss se jaab Chhuti Maangi
Taab ja ke pata chala meri kitne "Value" hai compnay me
Aankho Me aasu Aa Gaye
New jokes in hindi-
Girlfriend says to boyfriend: I’m PREGNANT…!!
boyfriend says: Are you sure its mine?
boyfriend starts crying & says:
“Yaar sab aise bolenge to kaise chalega…!!
Meri Aankhe Rakh Lo
Mujhe Kuch Khwab Dedo
Jisme Teri Jhalak Ho
Aesi Sharab Dedo
Chalo Choro Sari Bate,
Aisa Kro
.
.
.
2 Roti Or Thodi Dal Dedo.
New jokes in Hindi
Boy: Aapki sandle bahut acchi hai !
Girl: Haan utaaroon kya?
Boy:Chal pagli isse acchi to teri jeans hai
Abe O pagal, 1 Zabardast Sher Sun
Sher Bi Tu, Cheeta Bi Tu
Kya Frmaya?
Sher Bi Tu, Cheeta Bi Tu
Or
Bandron Ki Race Me “Jeeta” Bi Tu
Face fair karne k 3 tarike
.
.
.
.
Mujhe pta tha tu zaroor padhega kali surat wale…
Fair & lovely laga leee
:: Small jokes in Hindi ::
I Love
I Love u
I Love u
*
*
*I Love u
*
*
I love u So much
*
*
Bus Yehi kehna chahti thi
heer ranjha se. magar bechari ko ENGLISH nahi aati thi*
:: Small jokes in Hindi ::
Pehla Bhyanak joke of 2016.
phone rings tring tring..
1st: hello roshni he?
2nd: nahi he..
1st: nahi he to mombatti jala lo ho jayege.
New mobile Yoga specially performed by girls -
Selfie me btkh ki tarah muh banana bhi ek tarah ka Yog
he hai.....new selfie jokes in hindi
new jokes new jokes on santa banta new love sms new-sms new sms collection
new sms jokes new sms messages
Ye cheeze jab khatm hoti hai to bahut dard hota hai
Friendship
School
Money
Love
Sunday
Internet pack
Mast cute Saali ki Shadi
Paros me lahne wali preety girl ka transfer
Aur last wale me to Dil karta hai rooo hiii deee...new jokes in hindi
Kismat ho to Narendra Modi jaisi !!
Na parliament me opposition hai na ghar pe wife hai !!!
Bole to Life Jhinga la la
Husband comes home very early from shop and watch wife
with
Another handsome guy.
Wife- Why are you early.??
Husband- Who is he?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Wife- Duffer..Don’t try to change the topic.!
Love romance is just like hot tea and
heart is like Parle-G Biscut
Hadd Se Jyada Dubaoge To Toot Jayega...
Guess the minimum area with maximum decoration!!
Topper’s Answer was:
“WOMAN’S FACE”
Raat me motercycle or car ke peeche kute ese tezi se bhagte
hai jese
.
.
.
agle chorahe pe 2 tamacha khichkar gari chhin he lenge
Madam-Bacho choti madhumakhi tuko kaya deti h
Bache-Madhu, Shahad
Madam-Patli bakri ?
Bache-Milk
Medam-Aur moti bhes?
Bache-Homework only homework...
Madam-De thappar pe thappar....
Wo Girlfriend Kis Kaam Ki Jo Pyaar
Na De
Aur Wo Saala Dost Kis Kaam Ka Jo
Udhaar Na De..!
Aaj kal ladke ladki se milne ke baad
unka naam nahi poochte ye poochte hai-
tum WhatApp me ho?
Ladke wale-Jee ladki ne kaya kiya huwa hai
Ladki wale-Jee esne naak me dum kiya huwa hai
ese le jaye bas.....
Spiderman, Batman, Superman saab behosh
Dekh ke South Indian Movie ke Hero ka Josh
Mÿ Friend: Dost kaise ho?
Me: Mast hu..Bindaas hu..tu bata?
Mÿ Friend: Main bhi tik hu Yaar ek kaam tha..!
Me: Haan toh saare kaam karle, phir baat karte h....new new friend jokes
Fair N lovely cream sach me kaam karti hai me tab maan jaugaa
jab wo black money wale ko fair bana de

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