Latest double mining jokes collection 4
Ek Moti Aurat Mandir Mein Mannat Mangne Gayi.
Usne Mandir Mein Matha Tekne Ke Baad Pandit Se Kaha.
Aurat: “Pandit Ji, Main Aaj Idhar Bahut Badi Aas Leke Aayi Hun”
Pandit: “Haan Ji Mene Dekha, Jab Aap Matha Tek Rahe The“
lady..: bachcha Dhudh ni pirah ...
Dr... : chk kr k ....
dear is me dudh hi nhi h...
.
Lady ...kmine me bachche ki
mosi hu
Girl :- Daal do.
Boy - ruk ja Hawas ki pujaran pehle khana to khaa lene de
.
.
.
.
.
Girl :- kamine main khane wali Daal hi maang rahi hoon
Boss-Tumari ability?
Lady secretary-
Young hu,
Dynamic hu,
Sincere hu,
Honest hu,
Hardworking hu,
Qualified hu,
Experienced hu,
Deserving hu,
Typing janti hu,
File sahi rakhti hu,
Computer me expert hu,
Thoda accounts b janti hu,
Boss: aur kuch
Lady: Disease free aur healthy hu,
Copper T lagayi hai,
7 positions aati hai,
69 me Expert hu,
aur
Sabse Jaruri Baat k
Apne flat me akeli rehti hu...!
Boss: bas kar pagli,ab kya joinning ke Din promotion legi!!!!
Ek lady auto rukwa kar jane ke liye paise tai karte karte doosre auto main baith gayi. Pahla auto wala: Wah! madamji mera khada karwa ke aap doosre pe chad gayi.!
At police station:
Lady: Sir main lut gae barbaad hoo gae.. ????
Inspector: kyun kya hua madam ?? ??
Lady: mere sare gehne chori hoo gae...????
Inspector: kaise? kaha rakhe the gehne?? ??
Lady: main pehenke soee hue thee..??
Inspector: fir chore kaise huee?? ??
Lady: wo aadmi mere sare gehne uutharke lee gaya... ????
Inspector: kyaa! fir tumne usko pakda kyun nahi?? ??
Lady: "mujhe kya pata tha wo gehne churane ke liye uutar raha hai.." ??
English na aane ka Nuksaan:
Boyfriend: Darling, are you free tonight?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Girlfriend: Haramkhor! Free ke Bacche, Aaj se Pehle Kabhi Paise Liye Hai Tujhse?
अब आप भी बन सकते है अपनी गर्लफ्रेंड के बच्चे के बाप, वो भी बिना मेहनत किये!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
सन्देश लिखें <बच्चा> स्पेस <गर्लफ्रेंड का पता> और भेजें दें- 98760xxxxx.
मेहनत हमारी, ख़ुशी आपकी!
Fantastic Add By Call-girl:
.
Plot On Rent,
.
.
.
2″X4″ Area,
.
.
.
Good Frontage,
.
.
.
1 Bore Well With Garden Around,
.
.
.
Drainage Facility &
Milk Booth At Handy Distance.
Ek Sali apne Jija k sath train me ja rahi thi.
Raat ko wo kafi der tak Jija ko apne Qisse sunati rahi,
K,
Achanak Jija ne puchha:
"Kya Khayal Hai Aaj Raat Hum Dono "Miyan Biwi"
Ki Tarah Guzaaren"
Sali sharmate hue boli:
"Ji..., jaise aap ki marzi"
Jija:
"To chalo phir apni
bak bak band karo aur mujhe sone do"
A Chota Baccha Achanak Parents
Ke Bedroom Me Gya & Wahan Ka
Nazara Dekh Ke Chillata Hua Bola-
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Khud Jo Marzi Aye Chuso
Or Mujhe Angutha Chusne Pr Itna Marti ho. :-p :-p
SantaKa Baap Santa Ko Apni Marzi Se Shaadi Karne Ke Liye Gusse Se Bolta Hai
Santa Ka Baap: “Tune Iss Ladki Mein Kya Dekha Jo Iss Ladki Se Shaadi Kar Li.”
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Santa: “Daddy, Ye Bachpan Mein Angootha Bohat Achha Choosti Thi.
He- kya kar rahi hai?
She- leti hu.
He- kya leti hai? :-p
*Blocked* :-d
Sunny Leone Ne Tailor Ko Ek Rumaal De Ke Kaha, "Meri 3 Dress Bana Dena."
Abb Aap Tailor Ka Confidence Dekho... "Madam, Baaki Kapde Ka Kya Karu?"
Ek Aurat Ghar Par Akeli Thi Tabhi Darwaje Par Dastak Hui,
Usne Darwaja Khola To Ek Admi Khada Tha, Darwaja Kholte Hi Bola
Aadmi: “Tum Hot Maal Ho Kya”
Aurat Gabra Kar Dawaja Band Kar Deti Hai.
Agle Do Din Bhi Yahi Kram Chla To Aurat Ne Akhir Tang Aakar Ye Baat Apne Pati Ko Batai.
Pati Bola: “Chinta Mat Karo Aaj Jab Wo Aayega To Main Ghar Par Hi Hounga Aur Darwaje Ke Piche Khada Rahunga. Tum Use Bole Dena Ki Tum Hot Maal Ho”
Shaam Ko Jaisi Hi Wo Admi Aaya To Pati Darwaje Ke Pichhe Chhip Gaya.
Patni Ne Darwwaja Khola To Admi Bola: ” Tum Hot Maal Ho Kya?”
Aurat Boli: “Haan, Mein Hot Maal Hu”
Aadmi Hath Jod Kar Bola: “Ho To Apne Pati Ko Kyun Nahi Khush Karti?, Woh Sala Meri Biwi Ke Pichhe Kyo Pada Hua Hai?“
Husband Wife Car Mein Jaa Rahe The.
Husband Ne Wife Ko Darane Ke Liye Car Ko Tez Speed Se Chalaya Aur Puchha.
Husband: “Dekhi Meri Speed?”
Achanak Car Band Ho Gayi.
Wife Zor-Zor Se Hasne Lagi.
Hasband: “Kya Hua?”
Wife: “Kuch Nahi, Kal Raat Ki Yaad Aa Gayi“
Ek Ladki Ki T-Shirt Par Railway Track Ki Photo Bani Hui Thi.
Ladki Ke Saath Khada Hua Ek Baccha T-Shirt Ki Taraf Badi Gaur Se Dekh Raha Tha.
Ladki: “Beta, Kabhi Railway Track Nahi Dekhe Kya?”
Baccha: “Railway Track To Bohat Dekhe Hain Lekin Railway Track Par Speed Breaker Pehle Baar Dekh Raha Hun.”
Boy to Girlfriend:
Meri us jagah hath lago jahan haddi na ho.
Ladki haste hue: Chal fir nikaal bahar,
Pakdu??
Teri Zubaan Ko.
Agar aadhi raat ko aapka dil kare aur biwi ka mood na ho
To
Biwi ko tang na kare
.
.
Khud uthkar apne hath se
.
.
.
Pani pee lein!!
Ek bar fir aapki soch ko salaam.
Train mein lady bachche ko doodh
pilate hue: Pee le warna uncle ko pila dungi,
Thodi der baad uncle: Beta jaldi se decide
kar tere chakkar mein
2 station already aage aa gaya hu... .
A lady from 2nd flor asking 4 bananawala: Kela kaisa dega?
.
.
.
.
.
Bananawala: Memsab Aath me bara,
.
.
Lady told: Saat me tera deta hai to upar aaja!!!
Barsaat ki raat,
ek ladki bheege badan,
bheege hoath,
bheege baal,
Use dekh ke laga,
laga..
kal ye pakke bimar hogi.
Pehle gale se lagao,
Phir kiss karo...Phir bed pe litao,
Phir uske legs uthao..
Agar bachhe ne susu kar dia,
to pamper badlo
Ek Ladki Apni Saheli Se Uski Nayi-Nayi Shaadi Ke Baad Puchti Hai.
Ladki: “Kya Tumhara Pati Sote Waqt Kharate Leta Hai?”
Saheli Sharmate Hue: “Pata Nahi Abhi To Hamari Shaadi Ko 3 Din Hi Hue Hai, Soyenge To Pata Chalega“
एक अंग्रेज पाकिस्तान गया। उसने हवाई अड्डे से लाहौर
शहर जाने के लिए टैक्सी ली।
रास्ते में सुनसान जगह पर ड्राईवर ने टैक्सी रोकी और
उसका सब कुछ लूट लिया, कपड़े भी उतरवा लिए ताकि ज्यादा भाग दौड़ ना कर सके, शोर न मचा सके, उसे वीराने में फेंक दिया।
अंग्रेज शर्म के मारे एक पेड़ के पीछे खड़ा हो कर मदद की उम्मीद करने लगा।
तभी एक पठान उधर से गुजरा तो अंग्रेज ने उसे आवाज लगाई।
पठान - ओहो! ये क्या हुआ लाले दी जान?
अंग्रेज ने सारी बात बताई।
पठान अपना नाड़ा खोलते हुए बोला - यारा, तेरा आज दिन ही खराब है।
Pappu Jab Chota Tha To Ek Din Ghar Par Badi Late Aya
Maa Ne Dante Hue Usko Bola: “Tu Itni Raat Ko Kidhar Tha?”
Pappu: “Mummy, Vo Main Sath Wale Sharma Ji Ke Ghar Tv Dekh Raha Tha”
Maa: “Oye Juth Mat Bol, Unke Ghar Ka Man Gate To Rat Ko 8 Baje Hi Band Ho Jaata Hai”
Pappu: “Par Mummy Mene To Unki Khidki Mein Se Sari Movie Dekhi”
“Film Mein Ek Ladki Thi Jo Apne Kamre Mein Bethi Hui Thi, Tabhi Hero Aata Hai Aur Uska Hath Pakad Leta Hai Aur Fir Usko Puppy Karta Hua Bed Pe Lita Leta Hai”
Itne Mein Santa Kamre Mein Gussa Aur Ek Zor Ka Thappar Pappu Ko Maara
Maa: “O Ji, Kyu Maarte Ho Bachhe Ko, Film Ki Story Hi To Bata Raha Tha”
Santa: “Haramzada, Pata Nahi Kya Kya Dekhta Rahta Hai, Sharma Ji Ke Ghar Mein To Tv Hi Nahi Hai“
एक साहब सुबह-सुबह ऑफिस जाने के लिए
बस में चढ़े तो कंडक्टर ने मुस्कुराते हुए
पूछा :–
“कल रात ठीक-ठाक घर पहुँच गए थे
सर ?”
साहब: – “क्यों ? कल रात को मुझे
क्या हुआ था ?”
कंडक्टर – “टुन्न थे आप !”
साहब (गुस्से से) :– “ये तुम कैसे कह सकते
हो ? मैंने तो तुमसे बात तक
नहीं की थी ?”
कंडक्टर: – “ऐसा है सर जी, कल जब आप
बस में बैठे हुए थे तो एक मैडम बस में
चढीं थी और आपने उठकर उन्हें सीट ऑफर
की थी !”
साहब: – “तो ? लेडीज को सीट ऑफर
करना गुनाह है क्या ???”
कंडक्टर :– “गुनाह तो नहीं है सर, पर
उस समय बस में केवल आप दो ही पैसेंजर
थे !!!”
A man received a message from his
neighbor:
Sorry sir, I am using your wife… day and
night..
when you are not present at home… In fact,
much
more than you do.
I confess this now because I am feeling
very
guilty. Hope you will accept my sincere
apologies.
The man shot his wife..
A few minutes later he received another
message:
Sorry sir, a spelling mistake..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I meant wifi...
He: ab bada sawal ye hai ki.....
She: Haan, tumhara sirf sawal BADA ho sakta hai.
He: :|
1 bus me 1 aunty khadi thi..
.
.
.
.
.
.
1 bache ne kaha ki aap meri jagah
beth jaao..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aunti ne use thappad mar diya
.
.
.
.
.
.
kyu.. ??
.
.
.
.
kyu..??
.
.
.
.
Kyu ki bacha apne PAPA ki god me
betha hua tha..
Like: 176 - SMS Length: 266
Like SMS - Copy SMS - Forward SMS
Tags: Funny Jokes - Double Meaning Jokes -
1 year ago
By: sonu In: Jokes
Aadmi ko Zindgi mein sirf 2 cheezein achhi milni chahiye: Khuraak
aur
.
..
...
....
Suraakh!
Mehnat Itni Khamoshi Se Karo Ke Safalta Shor Machade.
This somehow reminds us of
.
..
...
....
Pregnancy and Child Birth!
